Here’s a little exercise I use sometimes to give myself a mood lift.  It’s especially useful in heavy traffic.  Think of something that makes you smile.  Not something that is funny and makes you laugh, but something that made you happy.  Perhaps it’s a childhood memory.  Perhaps it’s remembering a great moment with a pet.  Or maybe it’s the first time you saw the love of your life.  However you choose, find that special, genuine smile of happiness.  Once you have it, hold on to it.  If it was a big smile, let go of some of it until you have just a slight grin.  Keep this expression on your face willfully, even after the moment of remembering has passed.

Now observe everything through the faint hint of smile.  Did someone cut in front of you?  A little bigger smile.  It’s a shame they’re so stressed.  Too bad they can’t be smiling right now like me, right?

Your face might not be used to smiling for a long time, so don’t try and keep it so long it becomes uncomfortable.  The more you practice, however, the longer you can smile.  We know facial expressions often reflect how we feel, and this connection can go both ways.  How we feel can be affected by our facial expressions.

When I was a child, I listened to a song that said “laugh, laugh, laugh, and the whole world laughs with you.  Smile, smile, smile, and the sun keeps shining, too!“.  When you smile, it changes how you feel.  The way you feel affects how you see things and how you respond to them.

This simple, FREE exercise can help you avoid stress and actually leave you feeling more energetic instead of being emotionally drained by anger and frustration.

The understanding that being flexible rather than steadfast would seem to be a obviously simple concept.  It’s been observed throughout recorded history.

“The wind does not break a tree that bends.” – Sukuma proverb

“The tree that does not bend with the wind will be broken by the wind.” – Chinese proverb

“The frail reed that bends in the wind is stronger than the mighty tree that breaks.” – from Aesop’s  fable

“Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the Earth.” - the Bible, Matthew 5:5

“Vaut mieux prévenir que guérir.“ – French proverb meaning “It is better to prevent than to heal.”

“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” – Ben Franklin

The Daodejing also addresses this concept in Chapter 76.

When people are born, they are soft, supple and weak.
In death they are stiff, rigid and unbending.
In life, plants are pliant and delicate.
When dead they are withered, dried and brittle.
Therefore inflexible and unyielding are characteristics of death
while tender and weak are aspects of life.
Just as the sapless tree will split,
so will the inflexible force meet with defeat.

Certain styles of martial arts, namely Aikido and early Tai’Chi, heavily incorporate the principle of “blending not clashing”.  To overcome an opponent, you do not react strongly with your own energy but adjust in response to theirs.

No matter how universally apparent this is, many live their entire lives opposing the wind rather than moving with it.  They are comfortable in their routines, set in their ways, living in the past, et al.  Despite the historical evidence that all things change, all old ways evolve into new ways and not even the largest mountains are exempt, some of us will continue to deny the inevitable.

In fact, on the most acute scale, most of us have moments of being rigid in our daily lives.  Maybe not in obvious ways, such as in broad social, political, or religious stances, but in simple things like a change in routine: road construction puts you behind schedule on your commute, a co-worker calls in sick and you have to cover for them, a storm interrupts your Internet connection.  Either way you approach it, you are going to have to adapt to the change.

Your choice comes from how.  Will you be rigid which causes you to be stressed and can lead to increased emotional and physical decay or will you fluidly adapt like flowing water?  Reflect on how you respond to the winds of change in your life.  You may find additional ways to be like the reeds and in doing so, embrace the traits of life more fully.

It has long been considered that we have within us three distinctive types of energy.  The first is Shen, which represents our mental energies.  It is the sculpting force of our thoughts, our personality and emotions.  When shen is high, we are creative, happy, positive.  When it is low, we feel mentally exhausted and can succumb to ailments such as depression.

Another energy which is more commonly heard of in the western world is Chi or Qi.  This energy represents the “life force”.  It is our physical energy which powers the body from day to day.  It is everywhere around us, we breathe it in and it revitalizes us.  It’s the form of energy popularized in movies such as “Star Wars”, Eastern influenced holistic medical practices and even children’s anime.

The third energy is Jing, which is our core essence.  It is the initial essence from our beginning.  It is the DNA of energy so to speak.  It is jing that affects aging and lifespan.  Often considered an energy reserve, jing is used up through such things as overworking, stressful or harmful lifestyles or even excessive sexual activities (although the latter usually applies mainly to men).

Jing is also the only energy that can be physically manifested as it is a “compressed” energy.  Some believe the original tai’chi excercises taught the students how to compress chi energy into jing and use it as an actual forceful energy against an opponent.  Although these teachings are no longer widely known (if not lost forever) the concept of jing energy being used in hand to hand combat is no stranger to the Street Fighter style video game market.

All of the energies are interrelated, but the easiest to influence is the chi.  Which is why there are so many books, diets, videos and exercises designed to help us keep our chi up.  The foundations all begin with eating right, treating your body right and exercising.  From there you can find various methods of breathing, meditation, visualization, etc. to enhance the flow of chi through you.

Although it is theoretically possible to replace jing by compressing chi, it’s not commonly a natural practice so in order for us to live long, healthy lives, we need to avoid tapping into that reserve as often as possible.  Generally, we pull upon our reserves whenever the day to day energies are not enough to sustain our activities.  It doesn’t mean we need to avoid being energetic, it means we need to avoid things that drain us without opportunity for replenishment.

In the Western world, those things are numerous:  demanding careers, financial worries, perscription drugs for everything, addictions to things, status and sex.  Even exercise can be excessive when it’s the result of a drive to obtain some physical ideal appearance upon which a self worth is based.

My advice is to go get one of those books on chi.  Relax a bit, focus on your breathing, listen to the things around you.  You know what things in your life are draining your essence.  It’s not a secret that only an “enlightened one” can realize.  Make a list if you need to and then address each item one by one.  Obviously some of the items you simply may not be able to avoid, but some you can at least lessen their demand on you and likewise your jing.